Category: Lafftastic

I have no idea what these cute anime maggots are singing about (it’s in Korean), but they sure do love big curly piles of poo!
DUNG!
By way of Metafilter, I believe. I could be wrong.

A daring taste test of the top 5 best selling “wines” among the homeless. There for the name of science go…who are these people? I never knew that both Thunderbird and Night Train are bottled by E. & J. Gallo. Who woulda thunk it? What I want to know is what is actually in these drinks. And I don’t want to find out by drinking them.

Bum Wines
Cisco
18% alc. by vol.
Cisco is bottled by the nation’s second largest wine company, Canandaigua Wine Co., in Canandaigua, NY and Naples, NY – the same company as Wild Irish Rose.
Known as “liquid crack,” for its reputation for wreaking more mental havoc than the cheapest tequila. Something in this syrupy hooch seems to have a synapse-blasting effect not unlike low-grade cocaine. The label insists that the ingredients are merely “citrus wine & grape wine with artificial flavor & artificial color,” but anyone who has tried it knows better. Tales of Cisco-induced semi-psychotic fits are common. Often, people on a Cisco binge end up curled into a fetal ball, shuddering and muttering paranoid rants. Nudity and violence may well be involved too. Everyone who drinks this feels great at first, and claims, “It’s not bad at all, I like it.” But, you really do not want to mess around with this one, because they all sing a different tune a few minutes later. And by tune, I mean the psychotic ramblings of a raging naked bum.

A funny link, easily overlooked, by way of Boing Boing

Are these things real? Still, good for a laugh.
The 100 Worst Porn Movie Titles !
By way of Fleshbot

Surely, Alfred Jarry’s version is much more creative.

The Passion Considered as an Uphill Bicycle Race
Barabbas, slated to race, was scratched.
Pilate, the starter, pulling out his clepsydra or water clock, an operation which wet his hands unless he had merely spit on them — Pilate gave the send-off.
Jesus got away to a good start.
In those days, according to the excellent sports commentator St. Matthew, it was customary to flagellate the sprinters at the start the way a coachman whips his horses. The whip both stimulates and gives a hygienic massage. Jesus, then, got off in good form, but he had a fiat right away. A bed of thorns punc tured the whole circumference of his front tire.

Goodle Good News.
Oh yes.

Funny found-tape of some kid riffing in and out of (presumably) his parents’ spirituality tape as he tapes over it. I used to make tapes like this but not so, um, clean. Go to the page here and search for the Jack the Ripper link or go straight to the RealAudio.

“Real Dolls” are the next generation of sex dolls–very lifelife pieces of plastic that for thousands of bucks you can customize and shag in the privacy of your own basement. Nerve’s Grant Stoddard does the right, investigative-reporter thing and tells us what it’s really like to stick your pee-pee in one. Hilarity.

Amateur science experiments involving meat are what makes the Internet special. StinkyMeat

Qveere Eye for thye Medieval Man. Well, vy forsoothe, it is spotte-onne.

Spike Lee, man, you were robbed again!
I have yet to hear anyone state the obvious: The whole design of Mac’s new OS X package is a blatant copy of Lee’s 1992 “Malcolm X” poster.
People: “X”?
“Panther”?
“Black…Panther”?

Is Steve Jobs making a Black Power comparison here? Look at yet another example.

You think those venetian blinds are a coincidence???