Russell Davies has been documenting the vanishing English Cafe for a few years now on his two blogs. Now it seems his paean to the classic British slap-up meal, eggbaconchipsandbeans, is to be turned into a book. I know I want a copy, not just for its celebration of this utilitarian meal, but for his enthusiastic writing:
Because chips are extraordinarily delicious. One of the most compelling and bewitching substances known to man. It’s such a beautiful thing (and perhaps evidence of the existence of God) that the humble, tedious potato can be transformed, by the simple addition of heat and fat, into this delightful piece of sensory heaven. And that’s a mystical process yet to be adequately explained by human science. Let’s face it, if fat and heat normally made for bewitching beauty the beaches of Benidorm would be very different places.
And then this passage:
Imagine your ebcb is made up of the members of Queen.
Roger Taylor (the drummer) is your bacon. Essential. Got to have it. Makes a difference if its bad but even brilliant drumming (or bacon) will only get you so far. You can appreciate a drum solo for about 30 seconds after that it goes rapidly downhill; likewise a meal that’s entirely bacon. (I know, I’ve tried the Atkins diet.)
John Deacon (the bassist) is your beans. Again, essential. Again, it’s got to be right; but it’s hard to screw it up and even a magnificent contribution is only so good.
Brian May (the guitarist and Anita Dobson spouse and look-alike) is the egg. It’s a bit flashy. It can do a lot of different things, and for a while it can make a real difference, but it can’t sustain your attention for long. Man cannot live on eggs alone. (I know, I’ve tried the Atkins diet.)
Freddie Mercury is the chips. Or was. He made the difference. He made them sound like Queen. Queen with George Michael sounded moly like George Michael. Queen with that new old bloke from Free just sound like a band with some bloke from Free. The chips make the difference.
When you bring in Queen, you know you’re in prime Brit territory. You can advance order the book here.